50+ Dating Sites

Some people try online dating because they are looking for companionship, some for love, and some are tentatively dipping in a toe to see who’s out there .

But about 15 million people are registered for online dating and one in five relationships now starts online. It’s the third most popular way to meet (after pubs and through friends). And I could always go incognito when I’ve had enough – it’s the internet, after all!

There are an overwhelming 1,400 dating sites, though, so where to start? You decide to try those recommended by friends and that advertise the best success rates: date-lovers.nl

Things to keep in mind when dating over 50:

1. Every Person Comes as a Package Deal

It’s not reasonable to assume that someone will come to the table without some form of baggage. Whether that baggage is in the form of a bad divorce, a tensed relationship with a family member, or a sick parent, there is something that is going to be a priority in this person’s life, and that something will not always be you. No matter how much you may want to be #1, and no matter how much your date wants to make you #1, there are other factors at play. Just like you can’t say, “Let’s forget my family obligations for a month and take a yacht to St. Thomas,” they can’t either.

2. Manage Expectations

While most of us hope that each first date might also be the last first date, we are setting ourselves up for disappointment if we go into every date with such high expectations. The best way to go about dating is to simply take each experience for what it is—meeting a new person. Maybe you will learn something about your date, or even yourself, that might help you in life. Maybe you will hear a funny story. Or maybe you will simply meet, chat, and end your night knowing that while this person may not be “The One,” you gave it your all. Pinning your hopes on this one person simply creates too much pressure.

3. Everyone Ages

Almost all of my over-50 male clients tell me that women don’t age as well as men. And you know what my female clients tell me? Men don’t age as well as women. The moral: We all age! Everyone gets wrinkles, everyone’s metabolism slows, and everyone isn’t the 20-year-old sports star that he or she used to be. But that’s okay. Please don’t make overarching assumptions based on a number. Treat each person, regardless of his or her age, as an individual. For some reason, when we picture someone else our age, we picture someone “old.” If you’re not “old,” then perhaps neither are they.

4. Don’t Overlook Common Sense

People often tell me that online dating, and dating in general, is scary. They reason that you don’t know who’s out there, and most of the people are likely terrifying. I hate to say this, but terrifying people can be anywhere. Are there more of them online than offline? I have no idea. What I do know, however, is that if you avoid online dating to try to evade the “terrifying ones,” then you’re also closing yourself off to meeting many wonderful people as well.

Instead, take precaution when meeting someone for the first time. Meet in a public place. Tell a friend where you’re going. Yes, scary things are everywhere… but common sense will take you further than you might think.

Also remember that no one person or one experience represents the whole of the dating pool, so don’t base your beliefs or thoughts on such a small sample that happened to you or someone you know.

5. Love Yourself

While it may sound like a proverb, you have to love yourself before you can love anyone else. What does that mean? Finding a partner will not create happiness. You first need to find (or re-find) that happiness and confidence that you have in yourself.

Treat yourself well, heal from the last relationship and rediscover yourself. Only then can you add someone else to your world and know that he or she complements it, not completes it.

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