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Dating for Elderly

NINE THINGS ABOUT DATING FOR OLDER ADULTS:



1. Age DOESN’T matter

It seems unreasonable to say that people characterized by one attribute which is how old they are , don’t care about age when looking for a companion, but it’s true. Young people are incredibly age-discriminatory, to such an extent that age is one of the most important criteria used to find a match on online dating sites. Far more important is what shape you are in, how healthy you are, and what activities you can do

It seems unreasonable to say that people characterized by one attribute which is how old they are , don’t care about age when looking for a companion, but it’s true. Young people are incredibly age-discriminatory, to such an extent that age is one of the most important criteria used to find a match on online dating sites. Far more important is what shape you are in, how healthy you are, and what activities you can do

Adults over 55 are far more flexible in their approach to companionship. Part of this is probably the wisdom that comes with age, but even more significant is an essential truth about how age works. Once you get into your fifties and beyond, the actual number of your age becomes less and less significant. Far more important is what shape you are in, how healthy you are, what activities you can do

70 year-old woman looking for a man? If you’re active and like going for long walks and playing golf, you’re going to be much more interested in the fit and energetic 82-year-old who can share your activities than the 65-year-old with the hip replacement who can no longer walk long distances. On the other hand, the 75-year old woman who has had past back problems and likes to stay in with wine and movies might be a great match for that 65-year-old man.

2. Neither does look

The other stunning aspect of dating for young people is how much looks matter. We would be lying if we said that appearance wasn’t important at all to the over-55 statistics, but it turns out to be a much lower priority.

Maybe this is because older adults are wise enough to know that looks have very little to do with whether someone is going to be a kind, loving and caring companion. Maybe it’s because the physical nature of attractiveness changes when you get older, or maybe they know that being “hot and sexy” is more a function of your personality than how you look.

Whatever the reason, older adults will tell you that how someone looks is doesn’t matter much in their search to find a companion.

3. it’s not drinks, it’s dinner

One thing we have been struck with has been the important role that dinner plays in the social (or not-so-social) lives of most older adults. Nobody likes the idea of spending years cooking for themselves and eating alone. And always being the only single person when your married friends want to catch up for dinner starts to become a little tiresome. More than any other activity, dinner is where older adults feel the isolation of being alone most strongly. This is why, for older adults, a dinner date is the most important first step towards finding companionship.

This makes quite a comparison to how many young people organize their first dates, which usually involve meeting up in a bar. Several of today’s dating services are built specifically around this concept. For example, hooks up groups of young people in bars and offers them a free first drink as part of the package.



4. Not everybody is looking for love & marriage

The fundamental assumption behind most dating services for young people is that the ultimate goal is to find love and marriage. While this is true for some older adults, it is far from universal.

Many adults really are looking for companionship and nothing more. Some are seeking someone to have dinner with, some are looking for someone to travel with them, and others are looking for someone to share their favourite activities.

It’s always fun to have attraction, romance, and flirting. For many people at this stage, that is enough. For others, it’s more. There is an entire spectrum of dating that goes far beyond the marriage-oriented online dating services available today.

5. Its not just about one companion

Many older adults have multiple needs for companionship. Sure, some are focused only on finding that single life partner who will give them a loving relationship for the next few decades. But just as many are actually seeking multiple companions to fit in with their varied social needs.

This isn’t infidelity, it’s just common sense. A recognition that most older adults are prepared for the fact that no single person may be the solution to all their social needs, that they may be just as well served by multiple companions.

6. The real world counts

Senior with phone far more than their younger counterparts, older adults feel much more comfortable evaluating a potential match in the real world instead of online. That’s right, instead of texting and messaging; they actually prefer to talk to someone on the phone to find out if they like them.

7. Trust is hyper-important

Yes, trust is important to everyone, no matter how old they are. But for a retiree on a fixed income, who has heard countless stories of peers being taken advantage of both online and in the real world, trust takes on a special significance.

Just another example of why we love our members … they never cease to inspire us.

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